“A beautiful life is a lock the key to which is locked in yourself” – Harshit Jain
One thing that I have learned about life is – it’s a gift. And it wasn’t until recently that I realized this fact. Just in these past couple of months this change came into me when I summed it all up. Before this I was much like everybody else. Always cursing my life thinking about the bad stuff, saying, why me GOD? Just, why?
When the times get hard that’s what most of us do. Isn’t it?
You are special to be living in this world. The difference is only a few realize this fact. And it wasn’t until a big change came into me (or I brought into myself) did I realize this.
This change that came into me wasn’t an overnight thing either. Nor did I read or heard some magical words which made this happen. I believe that it all happened because I took the time to understand life by looking into myself – a thing many of us fail or just ignore to do.
But, how did I do all of this? Stick to the end of this post and you will have all your answers.
For now, let’s just focus on what sparked me initially.
Being the youngest kid born into a joint middle class family brings in a lot of challenges in front of you. Well, at least in my case it did.
If I wanted anything I always had to fight the hardest for it. And despite my best efforts it never really worked out for me.
My dreams were at the top of sky, filled with passion, ready to crush my goals but whatever it was no one really listened to me just because I was too young to be heard. As we all say, I wasn’t making an impact!
And there I was, forced to live by the ruthless norms of our pointless society. Just a regular millennial, you see. Ha!
But, good for me, I never really fitted into that position. I always knew that I wasn’t born for this. Study till I get a job; spend the next 30-40 years cursing my life; hating people and pursuing the things that I never really wanted; and spend the next 10-20 years waiting for my death?
I thought a lot about it and it never really made sense to me.
So, I took the daring to bring in a change and now, I am glad that I did.
As it is said,
Change is nature. And it all starts when you decide.
I realized that by bringing in small changes to your life, you can change your life completely. But without knowing how to do it all, it was a lot of guesswork for me.
Via this post, this is what I plan on doing – ‘Taking the guesswork out for you’.
So, let’s begin.
There are many pursuits we chase in our lives but from all there are some major ones that can really turn your life into something that we wish for everyday. And by my experience, they boil down to 4 specific ones. That’s how I got my life sorted out and I believe you would too.
Everybody wants to have this career which can earn them millions and billions (if not zillions) of dollars. We all crave for money. I do too! Seriously, who doesn’t like money?
But the problem is the way we approach it.
From the initial stage of our lives we start chasing something we never really wanted in the first place. Become an engineer there is a lot of scope, become a doctor and you’d be enjoying the rest of your live….blah blah blah. Nobody says become what you want to do from your heart.
Remember, if you aren’t following your passion you’re going in the wrong direction. Period.
But….maybe you are following your passion? Or maybe you are following something which you pretend to be your passion?
I have one question to ask that will get this sorted out.
Whatever is that you are doing, would you pursue it if I were to say that you will not get rewarded (monetary or other) for it for a very long time?
If your answer is “NO” to that question then trust me, it isn’t the thing that you really want to do.
You may think that I am insane and whatever you are doing right now may seem the only way in life but in reality it’s not. Just trust me on this one.
You know it very well, whatever is that you are doing, you are doing it because some random person did it and became super successful. Or let’s just say that a lot of people were doing and you went on with the flow. Or maybe your friend was doing it so you went along. Or at the point it seemed like to be the only easy option.
Isn’t this the way it all goes?
But have you ever wondered why is that only a specific guy became super successful when so many did the same thing? He’s just like everybody else. Doesn’t have any extra brains hanging out from his head, right? Then, why so that only he was able to do it?
Go on, give it a good thought.
The reason that he became so successful is because it was his ‘true passion’. It was the thing that he would choose above anything else.
Becoming what he is today was his life-long journey and he put in the efforts beyond your (or even mine) level of imagination. It was the thing that he would pursue even if it meant nothing for him for a very long time!
You could try but you can never become the same no matter how hard you try.
This is because passion isn’t something that you see people doing, becoming successful, and drive the same in yourselves. It’s something that you just get to know about yourself from the way you are. It’s what you feel from inside the thing you should be doing.
As Simon Sinek says, “Passion is something that you’d probably do for someone for free every single time”.
There’s this click that happens within you and you just know that this is what you were born for. I found my passion the same way and it all happened with me when I was just 14. That was the age I got into internet marketing and I knew this is what I was born to do right when I got into it.
Because, it felt so free!
I felt so happy by doing what I did, learning about new things, connecting with similar people. There was just so much to learn. Every single day I was spending more than 12 hours into it without getting anything in return. And the next morning, I would wake up with the enthusiasm to do even more.
It wasn’t like some boring subject to study or a rigid 9 to 5 job which someone had to force me to stick to. Neither did I do it because I saw someone else doing it and becoming successful. When I started I wasn’t even aware of the fact that something like this even exists!
I did it because I loved it. I loved it so much that I learned every in and out of it all by myself. No one was there to teach me or guide me. I did it all by trial and error method.
As of now, I am 19 and the only thing that has happened with me is that my love for myself and what I do has deepened to a whole new level. I could sacrifice anything in my life but not my work.
This feeling is what passion is in its true sense.
I am not the only one here. Take a look at many other successful people out there – Jack Ma, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Walt Disney, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dwayne Johnson (The Rock).
Take a look at their stories and you will know what being passionate looks like.
The modern world, as we all know it, has lost the true meaning of building relationships. A big portion of which is destroyed by the trending Social Media!
The thing that was built to connect us is actually becoming a reason for mass separations.
People today have lost the true sense of building relationships.
Now, it’s all about – Hey dude, how many likes did you get on your Facebook update? How many followers have you got on Twitter/Instagram? Is anyone even seeing your SnapChats?
That’s all what we keep doing all day.
For most, that’s 50% of their daily routine! This means they are wasting almost 12 hours every day on this!
Swiping all day on your phone and not actually meeting or talking to anyone in person is the biggest reason for bad relationships. And it is also a big reason for superficial relationships too.
We all want to show others that we have this crazy dream life but in reality it’s far far away from it.
And we aren’t doing it because we need to. We do this in hope to gain popularity and respect from our peers – The thing that we feel our lives revolve around.
But does it?
Again, I have one question for you.
When was the last time you actually made a friend without thinking about any benefit for your own?
Bump me, when you find an answer for it.
Having hundreds or even thousands of friends on social media sites mean nothing if you don’t have even one in reality on whom you can rely on blindly in your bad times.
Whether it be your friend or your special one, true relationships are just not built that way. Thank God I got far away from all of this.
The thing you must understand is, relationships are a way of nature and are formed slowly. These are not just one timer things. These are slow processes – journeys/pursuits to be exact.
You don’t just swipe right on Tinder and form a relationship! Or end a relationship just by unfriending or deleting them from your profile.
It’s all little by little things that form a good dearest relationship. Even standing by the other in bad times and situations doesn’t build relationships just like that. Building love and trust takes time.
Remember, the day you will start treating relationships as a thing of heart and not some business made for beneficial purposes from your mind will be the day you will start understanding what true relationships truly mean in life and how greatly it can affect our lives.
Happiness & Satisfaction
I am combining the last 2 pursuits in a single one because they are just so inter-related. Describing them differently would just mean overlapping of the same info. So, yeah, nevermind!
You see, I have been this guy who wants to achieve something so desperately that I have been literally going crazy for it. And most of us are like the same way if you are driven for something.
All of us believe that real satisfaction and happiness will be achieved only when you reach that point. A while ago I did too.
But, what if I said that it wasn’t the case?
What if I told you that the real happiness and satisfaction is right now in this very moment?
You’d be like, what!?
My ass is real broke, none of the things are working out, am depressed like hell, stress levels are off the chart and what I am saying is that happiness and satisfaction is right now in this very moment?!?!?!
Very funny, ha?
Hard to believe, but it is what it is.
Pursuing my own life journey, chasing my own dreams, and meditation has led me to believe that the real happiness and satisfaction comes from the journey (the present moment) not the end result. You can stress over it all you want but unless you accept this fact your suffering will never end.
And, let me show you why.
There is absolutely no end to our wishes no matter how hard you try. You cannot resist this temptation, whatsoever.
Want to become a millionaire? Cool thing! Let’s say, you do become one. But, what’s next? After sometime, you’d want to become a billionaire seeing that someone is still ahead and far better than you.
This cycle will keep on spinning because there will always be more of what you can achieve. Unless you cherish what you have achieved and where you are right now, you will never find happiness and satisfaction in your life.
Accepting the way you are right now, and enjoying your journey to become better spreading humanity along the way, is what that will bring true happiness and satisfaction in your lives.
Happiness is not that one big moment. It’s the little things in building that moment. In your life, you will cherish these little things way more than that one specific big moment.
Don’t believe me? Take a look at your own life pursuits and tell me if I am wrong. What do you remember the most in these pursuits? That big moment or those countless little moments of happiness that built it?
Just for an example, take a look at your graduation. What do you remember the most? The graduation day or the years spent in for reaching that day?
The funny thing is that we never really follow it all in the right direction because no one actually pointed to it. And we were just too dumb to figure it all out on our own…right?
Most people are going towards the wrong way and just like that we start following others without even thinking about it for a second.
Answer this –
If your path was the right one, why wouldn’t it be working out? Why would you be so sad at the end of every single day? Why despite of your best efforts you aren’t finding peace and satisfaction? Just, why???
But, what can you do, right? You haven’t got a single clue!
Or, do you?